Lesson 10

Well, you're officially 2 now, and let me tell you, you're giving us a run for our money this month. Right after your birthday party, you came down with your first real cold. Which then turned into a double ear infection. We're just now getting back to normal but, I'm afraid being sick and getting what you wanted all the time has now helped create a (temporary) monster. Tantrums abound in our house, biting, kicking, screaming. We had to wait outside of your great grandma's wedding because you refused to sit still or even not scream at the top of your lungs. There was already plenty of potential drama going on, and I didn't want us to cause a scene at a wedding, which brings me to lesson 10...

There are certain times you should never cause a scene, even if you're in the right. Weddings, funerals, holidays, and family events should all be drama free. I don't care if you hate someone's guts. Until the occasion is over, you play nice. No one wants to have their wedding day marred by 2 people yelling at each other or arguing. Kids shouldn't have their graduations or school plays disrupted because of the same thing. Whenever there is an event, you call a truce, even if the other person doesn't abide by it. Be the bigger person and just wait until you can privately address them. It won't matter to anyone else whether you were right or wrong, they'll just know that you couldn't keep your mouth shut during whatever the special event is.

Lesson 9

We just had your second birthday party. You were so cute, running around telling everyone "Hi!" Then, running away giggling before they could respond. I know it won't be long and you won't want me at your birthday party. Eventually, you'll be older and instead of Chuckie Cheese, you'll want a party at a bar with your friends only. That's why I try to take as many pictures and videos of you as I can. One day, you're not going to be my little boy anymore, you'll be my little man. :) Which brings me to lesson 9.

Always make sure you stop to smell the roses. Some of my best memories aren't necessarily of holidays or trips, those are great, but I frequently try and pause just to take in a day. I still remember one day, walking to the park with you. I don't remember how old you were exactly, or even what time of day it was. But, I remember listening to you say "Hi!" to all the neighbors and their dogs as we walked. I remember it was breezy, and the trees were rustling, I even remember you were wearing red. You've always looked good in red. It's important to take a small moment every once in awhile just to enjoy life. Not just big important events or trips, but just everyday stuff that most people forget about as they get older. 

Lesson 8

So much for keeping up with my posting, I never said I wasn't a procrastinator. Tomorrow is Halloween, which sets off my favorite time of the year. I love holidays. I love decorating, dressing up, and cooking. I love the snow, lights, hot cocoa, I even love the cleaning. Your Dad isn't really much into the holidays. He thinks they're too commercial and while he isn't a Scrooge, he certainly doesn't go as crazy as I do. Holidays in my house were always about getting everyone together. Even though every other day of the year may not be the most harmonious, I knew that the holidays would be great. Maybe I'm just older now and see things through a colored lens, but I hope that I live up to that for your holidays. Which brings me to lesson 8.

Holidays are about family. Sure there are religious implications, Christmas especially. However, I think everyone can agree that no matter what your religious belief is (and I hope we've figured out how to explain that to you by the time you read this,) that holidays should be about togetherness, no one should be alone on the holidays. Every year I cook and clean for Thanksgiving for all my side of the family, sometimes it's the only time we see each other during the year. For one weekend a year, we get together and eat, drink, tell stories, go out to have fun, and since you're birthday is so close to all the holidays celebrate your birthday. Holidays are about reminding yourself and the rest of your family and friends that you're thankful for each others company. That you appreciate them, and that no matter how far apart you live, you'll always be together. Sure, you'll get stuff, but when you're older you don't remember the stuff. Sure I remember the year I got my first stereo, or the year I got my waterbed and Mickey blanket, the year we got our first Nintendo, but what I really remember the most is everyone getting together. I remember how my grandmother's tree always looked. I remember putting decorations on the tree with your uncle. Don't get caught up in all the stuff. Enjoy it, be thankful for it, but remember it's people that make the holiday.

Lesson 7

When I was a Freshman in college, I tried my hand at stand up during open mic night at my dorm. What resulted was something so bad that the next year, a NEW Freshman asked if I was "that girl who bombed." I can honestly say I was glad that none of my friends were able to make it, and I wish I had been drunk... at least then I would have had an excuse. But, I did it. While I'd never do it again, I did at least attempt it once... and never want to speak of it again. Which brings me to lesson 7.

Learn to laugh AT yourself. Someday, you're going to do something so mortifying you'll never want to talk about it again. The only way your going to be able to look yourself in the mirror the next day if you learn to laugh at whatever dumb thing you did. If you learn to laugh at yourself, you'll be able to let others laugh too... just make sure you don't do it on tape. :)

Lesson 6

Yesterday, one of my cousins told me she wanted to buy a DVD for her son and couldn't because both her and her husband were out of jobs. I went ahead and bought it online, and told her to expect an early Christmas present for him from me. It was only $15 and she started to cry. It was a small thing, in fact, I had already pre-ordered my own copy a few months ago, and I didn't think twice about it. However, it was huge to her. Which brings me to lesson 6.

Always do what you can when you see someone is having a hard time. Whether it's helping a neighbor in with some groceries or buying a DVD for a family member. You don't have to spend money you don't have. Sometimes just an email letting them know you're willing to listen is all it takes. The world is full of "if it hadn't been for..." stories that prove small things count. Besides, one day you might be having a rough time and wouldn't you like it if someone did something nice for you?

Lesson 5

I hope by the time you've read this, I have gotten my scrapbooks caught up, but right now, I have 3 waiting for me to start or finish. At least one for you, one of my college graduation, and one for family vacations. I enjoy it. I like going into a scrapbook store and seeing all the stickers and paper, I like thinking to myself "I can get that same thing cheaper at XYZ store..." I enjoy my hobby. I find it relaxing to see that everything fits on a page, I like remembering all the memories from the photos as I paste them in, and let's be honest, I like showing off my work and hearing how I'm SOOOO creative. ;) (I'm your mom, I didn't say I was modest.) Which brings me to lesson 5...

Find a hobby you enjoy. Something you can leave for awhile if life starts getting too busy, but that you can pick right up where you left off when you stopped. Your Dad likes to race RC cars. I find that as interesting as he finds my scrapbooking. It doesn't have to be expensive, or high maintenance. Just make time to do something you enjoy. Something that someone isn't paying you for, something you can relax with. Hobbies shouldn't add more stress than they relieve, so don't get so wrapped up in it that other parts of your life suffer. But everyone should have a hobby even if it's not unique. If nothing else, it will help you meet new people. :) 

Lesson 4

When I was younger, I was a goodie goodie. I didn't swear, I didn't cheat. I was always the responsible one that teachers and parents would ask because they knew I would tell them the truth. Because of that, I missed out on some of the more mischievous parts of my childhood. Which brings me to lesson 4.

Get into trouble once in awhile. I'm not saying knock over a liquor store or rob a bank. Just a little bit of trouble. Have adventures, have secrets, (small ones.) Go to the lake with girls, even though you tell me you're only going with the guys. Go to parties, if you need a ride home, call. I promise you won't be grounded... unless I find out you were drinking and got behind a wheel. Always stand up for what you know is right, but learn to let your hair down and have fun. You don't have to be the responsible one all the time, you'll have plenty of time for that when you're grown and on your own.

Lesson 3

I am a coupon freak. I have a system, I sometimes save as much as $100 on a single trip to the store. I'm always looking for a deal. Deals make the world go around. One day, you'll be in charge of your own money and you'll need these skills. Your grandpa (Dad's Dad) is famous for going dumpster diving, spending hours working on something, and then telling the 2 hour story how he saved himself $10. (Ask your grandma how many dish racks she has :) ) Which brings me to lesson 3.

Know when to spend money and when to save it. Doing your own oil changes and car maintenance will save you a LOT of money, so will knowing how to fix things like a washer or dryer, and doing house projects on your own. However, there are times when you should spend money. One day, you might have your own home. If you can afford it, pay for a lawn service. Yes, you can do the work yourself, but if you pay for a service, you don't have to make the time to do the work, you don't have to work in the heat, and you won't have to buy the lawn equipment. School books, buy used, don't try to avoid buying them. Don't dig in neighbor's trash looking for an old VCR (that's an ancient form of entertainment that played movies at home) only to spend more in time and money to get it working. Use coupons when you have them, but never on a first date (same goes for gift cards.) Do your homework on big items, find the best buy for your buck. Don't just assume a cheaper version is going to be just as good, and don't assume that a more expensive item is better. Don't avoid thrift stores and garage sales. The best sewing machine I've ever owned came from a garage sale for $20 and that included a work table. (Just don't buy used underwear.) Learn the value of your buck early, and you'll never regret it.

Lesson 2

When I was a kid, I played with my cousins all the time. We practically grew up together. That's why Cousin Nikki, is Aunt Nikki. I can't tell you how many trips to the zoo or to the park we made. My grandmother used to load us all up in her giant grandmamobile and take us to all kinds of places to play. We moved to Kansas City when I was 12. Nana, Uncle Danny, and I are your only blood family here. Your cousins, unfortunately don't live in town. Maybe by the time you read this, Uncle Danny will have settled down with someone and have kids, but I think you're going to be missing out on the big family experience that I had. Which brings me to lesson 2.

Family is very important, and the family you make is in many ways better than the family you choose. One day you're going to make friends. Hopefully, GREAT friends. They'll become your brothers and sisters in spirit. Choose them wisely. Friends are a dime a dozen, but best friends will be with you when blood family can't. They'll be there for you when there is an emergency, they'll give you advice, they'll be there to get you into trouble, and out of trouble. Never hold someone at arm's length because they're not blood relation, embrace those friends, when you're old you'll have someone who you can trust your own kids with, whose kids will play with yours, and who can tell stories about you that no one else will know.

Lesson 1

I remember exactly when it happened. I was sitting on a couch watching an old re-run of Alfred Hitchcock with your grandmother. A roommate came home to find his other roommate frozen in bed because he found a snake in his bed and was afraid he'd be bitten if he moved. 30 minutes later, the character leaped from the bed and found no snake. He left, and the roommate sat down on the bed, and was promptly bitten and killed by the snake, who had been hiding in the sheets. Ever since then, I've been deathly afraid of snakes. So afraid, I won't go out into the yard at night unless it is lit up, I won't swim in a lake (something I loved doing when I was younger,) and I won't go near bushes and shrubs unless I can see under them. This is your first lesson.


Never let a fear keep you from doing something you enjoy.I'm not talking about jumping out of a plane because you fear it (which by the way, no.) I'm talking about those little fears that will creep up on you as you get older and learn that not every animal is cute and cuddly, or that every person you meet isn't a character from Sesame Street. Fears are sometimes a good thing, they tell your gut that something might not be a good idea, but you never change your life to avoid something you're afraid of. I know I'm not a good role model in that department, but in my defense, snakes are evil. ;)

It came to me in a sleepless night.- A Letter to my Son.

Last night, I went to bed very tired, but as soon as I hit the pillow my brain started racing. This is not unusual, I tend to plan the next day while lying in bed, which leads to more thinking... it's a big horrible circle. As I tossed and turned, a thought came to me about how it would be nice to journal the small things that I want to share now. Now, while I'm still a young, cool Mom. Before I become the older, more conservative Mom. I even thought of a few ideas. So, here's my blog.